Inspired by a Fellow Bloggers Frustration with wrong numbers and yet another frsutrationg with office phone calls, i have compiled a list of things to do with wrong numbers, and annoying telemarketers.
Wrong Number scenarios:
-Hello, Is this Joes pizza? Id like to make an order for pickup?
No, im sorry, you have the wrong number.
-What are you talking about? i just dialed 784-7847
No, sir, you made a mistake, you dialed 787-7877
-Cant be, You just dont want me to have any pizza.
(pause)
Actually, your right. I am part of a consipracy to void you of pizza in your life. we have hijacked this pizza store and were waitying for you call to tell you. We have all the pizza sauce in the world here being held hostage. Now what are you going to do.
(man on other end hangs up)
OR:
Sure, Can I take your order. Take order, Ask Rediculous questions about pizza temperature and direction his house faces. Write it down. Hang up. laugh. (get his credit card number, because your delivery boy doesnt take cash)
If its a doctors office, lets have some REALLY obscene personal conversations with a total stranger. its my most favorite thing to do.
Im going to admit, I refuse to answer my phone in my office. I get so many telemarketers who just WONT take no for an answer. or better yet, they Accept my no, then have another member of the company, or even worse, they themselves call again in a month.
Asking, hi, just wondering if you had changed your mind about the water cooler.
Thats when i pretend im my own seceratary, or that i am the replacement for my former self who commited suicide due to annoying telemarketers who wont take no for an answer.
Better yet, the service in my office is getting shaky: Can you hear me now? Static. Hang up.
or, pretend there is a firedrill, or actual natural distaster occuring in your office and you have to evacuate the building, but forget to hang up the phone.
The never ending hold also works.
Now I send everyone to my voicemail. My bosses and my actual business associates know to contact me via AIM or my Crackberry.
Ok im done. If you think of more, lemme know:)
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
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2 comments:
Telemarketers have to go through the front desk at our office, and because I'm in marketing, apparently that means I take all useless calls. But the secretary is always nice enough to tell me when it's a sales call.
I generally pick up the phone, say "no" without them actually saying anything and hang up. Or, I put on a really heavy accent and say "huh? what?" a lot. Makes for great fun!
im also in marketing. I get where your coming from.
I dont say no, though, i let them go to voicem,ail hell, where i delete them as soon as i hear
"Hi, this is Soand So from Such and Such adevrtising"
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